Friday, 21 July 2017

5 Ways Journaling Can Help You Get Through the Hard Stuff

“In the journal I do not just express myself more openly than I could to any person; I create myself. The journal is a vehicle for my sense of selfhood. It represents me as emotionally and spiritually independent. Therefore (alas) it does not simply record my actual, daily life but rather—in many cases—offers an alternative to it.” ~Susan Sontag

My first journal was born into existence when I was twelve. I remember carefully choosing my favorite comics, pictures from magazines, and the odd scribble I’d drawn. Tongue stuck out in concentration, gluing them strategically on an unused exercise book. Wrangling with the clear sticky contact mum used to cover my schoolbooks, I encased the precious creation in it, preserving it forevermore: Nicole’s Diary.

Needless to say it’s an extremely embarrassing collection of teenage angst, weird bits and pieces like lists of potential names for a child I didn’t and still don’t want; pages of dialogue between myself and other people with in-depth analysis of these conversations beyond anything reasonable; and daydreaming about the life I wished I had or complaining about the life I did have.

Whenever I happen upon this old journal, It takes strength not to throw it away, just in case some invisible person were ever to discover it and think this was actually me.

The journals since then have gone through phases. Phases where I wrote every day, or just once every few months. Where I was obsessed with recording quotes or where I collected everything from movie tickets to foreign sweet wrappers. There are endless lists, ways to improve myself, deep sadness, furious anger, joyful enthusiasm, unbridled hope, and ponderings on love during many a loving or loveless encounter.

Historically journaling has been extremely popular, and if you think about the mountains of YouTubers and bloggers, it still is.

They used to be more of a private affair, but consider the way we write when we really let the pen go. We’ve derived important pieces of the past from people’s journals. Are they genuine portraits of the time, or just endless, worrisome chatter from a mind trying to figure stuff out?

These days it’s popular to have a gratitude journal, and I can see why—the idea being to cultivate gratitude as part of our being, and not give so much weight to the negative and the worrying. Remembering what we are grateful for is supposed to give us perspective on the hard stuff.

But I don’t know. Writing about the hard stuff is actually what helps me get through it. It’s what makes journaling so incredibly powerful.

Here are five reasons why:

1. Journaling is the act of processing the past (and sometimes the future) in the here and now.

For many of us, talking and writing isn’t about performance or the telling of something—it’s actually the processing. Getting it outside of yourself can give it a new shape.

It’s like opening the clothes drier mid-cycle. You interrupt the cyclic thinking and the jumble of ideas fall out, allowing each one to be tossed around and thought about on it’s own. The amount of times solutions have begun to appear while I was actually writing is astounding.

2. Writing is and of itself cathartic.

Try this: Set the timer on your phone for ten minutes, grab a pen, and write about your day until the alarm goes. Give yourself permission to burn it if you find yourself getting held back by the worries of who is going to read it (or delete it if you typed).

Even if nothing at all has happened, you will most certainly have thoughts in your head that are dying to get out. Offloading conscious and subconscious stuff helps the mind become clearer and you calmer.

3. Feelings and experiences become less overwhelming.

A while ago I wrote a blog post about my partner’s beautiful little old dog being killed in a car accident. When I was writing the piece, I found myself crying almost the whole time.

As I described the accident, moved onto what she meant to him, as I remembered my own times with her, it became an incredibly meaningful process. I spent some time looking for photos and wanted to honor her and the humans she had touched in her life.

Writing about the grief helped me immensely. It slowed it down as well as enriched her life. I stopped simply wanting to escape the awful feeling and instead was able to wade through it and just feel. Even if no one read it, I felt like I’d created a full-bodied process—a eulogy—that honored her and helped me hold her light after she’d passed.

4. Reading back helps reveal patterns.

Sure, it can be frustrating to look back at a journal from three years ago and see that you are writing about the same thing in the same ways again, but that can also be empowering. It’s a researcher’s dream: go back and investigate and then spend some time reflecting on what keeps you stuck if you notice patterns.

Similarly, you can celebrate any little (or big) changes you have made. “Wow, I used to worry about what people thought of me so much… it seems now I’m more concerned with what I think of myself and if I’m being a good person. What does that tell me about my journey so far? What do I want to take with me moving forward?”

5. You can use creative journaling to change your story.

We tend to tell our stories in the same way over and over, emphasizing the same points in the same ways, and even adding to a narrative by noticing everything that fits in with the story and ignoring everything that doesn’t.

If that narrative is overwhelmingly negative (i.e.: I’m a people pleaser; I’m a doormat; I’m hopeless; I’m a victim; I’m unlovable; I’m always anxious; I can’t do anything about this; Only jerks like me etc.) then it can lead to a full-on negative identity conclusion based on one pretty shaky theme.

Try injecting some freshness into a tired story. Journal prompts easily found via Google can help you do that, inviting you to answer questions you wouldn’t normally think of in the context of any given experience.

Writing requires you to dig a little deeper into stories, where you may find that the ‘full’ conclusion isn’t based on much: you’ve dated a few jerks and have decided that you only ever attract terrible people. But if you are prompted to consider all the facts, there was a decent person who you just weren’t attracted to, so is there a more truthful nuanced conclusion to be considered in this narrative?

What becomes available when you widen your perspective?

I can think of a bunch more reasons why journaling deserves a comeback, but I hope these five have injected some enthusiasm in you as a great starting ground. Just last month I began my own personal project of writing almost daily again, as well as launching a little Facebook group to discuss journal prompts.

Sharing some of your writing has an added benefit of being seen—becoming visible in the ways you want and feel safe to. To acknowledge your struggles as well as find humor in them, and be able to see beauty in who you are no matter what, is more than worthy of the little effort it takes to pick up a pen (or use a voice machine) and pour ourselves onto the page.

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About Nicole Hind

Nicole Hind is an Australian online counselor who fiercely believes that we all have stories that deserve to be wrenched out of the shadows, increase a sense of hope, of self-worth, and provide clarity on how to approach challenges for the rest of our lives. If you're curious go and scroll through her website, she’s open to new inquiries: http://ift.tt/2q0FQso.

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Saffron (Kesar) Uses, Research, Remedies, Side Effects, Ayurvedic Medicines

Kumkum – Crocus sativus is an Ayurvedi herb used for the treatment of acne, black head, diarrhea, skin diseases, impotency and acts as immunity enhancer and memory booster.  Latin name- Crocus sativus Linn. Family- Iridaceae Saffron – names in different languages: Hindi name- Kesar English name- Saffron Arabic name- Jafran Bengali name- Jafran, Kumkum Guajarati […]

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Sudarshan: Crinum latifolium, Uses, Research, Medicine

Sudarshana- Crinum latifolium is a plant mentioned in Ayurveda for the treatment of fever, swelling, case of poisoning and skin disease.  Latin name- Crinum latifolium Linn. Family- Amaryllidaceae Names in different languages: Hindi name- Sudarshan, Chindar, Kanmu, Kunwal, Pindar, Kanwar, Barakanwar, Arabic name- Haliyaon Bengali name- Sukhadarshana, Barakanur, Bada Kanod, Gaerhonar Patta, Nagdaun. Gujarati name- Nagadamani, […]

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Pineapple Benefits, Research, Remedies Side Effects

Pineapple Ananas comosus is a plant useful for the treatment of anorexia, dysmenorrhea, renal calculi, intestinal worms and general debility.  Latin name- Ananas comosus Merr. Family- Bromeliaceae Names in different languages: Hindi name- Ananas English name- Pineapple Bengali name- Anarasa Many of the Indian languages know the plant as Ananas. Brazilian name – Ananas, Nana […]

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Thursday, 20 July 2017

Jul 20, Holistic Healing Guide

Comprehensive information about holistic healing for mind, body and spirit, nature vs nurture, choosing a practitioner, allopathic and alternative medicine and more.

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The next Worldwide Womb Blessing is on AUGUST 7TH 2017 - please...



The next Worldwide Womb Blessing is on AUGUST 7TH 2017 - please register now and allow the energy and intention of over 155,000 women feed and nourish your dream of your sacred self.
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Dravite Aids Self Acceptance, Strong Grounding Energy

Dravite

Dravite is the name for deep brown Tourmaline. It aids you to have a deeper acceptance of yourself, it is soothing, aids stress and helps to bring the shadow side of yourself forward to help you to deal with old problems.



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Three Kinds of Laziness

The Buddha described three kinds of laziness. First there is the kind of laziness we all know: we don’t want to do anything, and we’d rather stay in bed half an hour later than get up and meditate. Second, there is the laziness of feeling ourselves unworthy, the laziness of thinking, “I can’t do this. Other people can meditate, other people can be mindful, other people can be kind and generous in difficult situations, but I can’t, because I’m too stupid.” Or, alternatively, “I’m always an angry person;” “I’ve never been able to do anything in my life;” “I’ve always failed, and I’m bound to fail.” This is laziness.

The third kind of laziness is being busy with worldly things. We can always fill up the vacuum of our time by keeping ever so busy. Being occupied may even make us feel virtuous. But usually it’s just a way of escape. When I cam out of the cave, some people said, “Don’t you think that solitude was an escape?” And I said, “An escape from what?” There I was—no radio, no newspapers, no one to talk to. Where was I going to escape to? When things came up, I couldn’t even telephone a friend. I was face-to-face with who I was and with who I was not. There was no escape.

Our ordinary lives are so busy, our days are so full, but we never have any space even to sit for a minute and just be. That’s escape. One of my aunts always kept the radio on, or the television. She didn’t like silence. Silence worried her. Background noise rang out at all times. And we’re all like that. We’re afraid of silence—outer silence, inner silence. When there’s no noise going on outside we talk to ourselves—opinions and ideas and judgments and rehashes of what happened yesterday or during our childhood; what he said to me; what I said to him. Our fantasies, our daydreams, our hopes, our worries, our fears. There is no silence. Our noisy outer world is but a reflection of the noise inside: our incessant need to be occupied, to be doing something.

Recently I was talking with a very nice Australian monk who was once occupied with doing so many wonderful dharma activities that he became a workaholic. He would be up until two or three in the morning. Eventually he collapsed totally. His whole system fell apart and now he can’t do anything. His mind is also slightly impaired in that he doesn’t have very good concentration.

His problem was that his identity was connected with doing. As his work was for the dharma is looked very virtuous. It looked like he was doing really good things. He was benefiting many people and carrying out the instructions of his teacher, but now that he can’t do anything, who is he? And so he is going through a tremendous crisis because he always identified himself with what he did and with being able to succeed. Now he is not able to do anything and is dependent on others. So I said to him, “But this is a wonderful opportunity. Now, you don’t have to do anything, you can just be.” He said he was trying to come to that, but he found it threatening not to do anything, to just sit there and be with who he is, not what he does.

This is the point—we will our lives with activities. Many of them are really very good activities but if we are not careful, they can just be an escape. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t do good and necessary things, but there has to be breathing in as well as breathing out. We need to have both the active and the contemplative. We need time to just be with ourselves, and to become genuinely centered, when the mind can just be quiet.

This excerpt is an adaptation from Jetsunma Tenzin Palmo’s book Into the Heart of Life, taken from Snow Lion: The Buddhist Magazine & Catalog, a quarterly effort from Snow Lion Publications

[This story was first published in 2011]

 

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Don’t forget to sign up for this transformative challenge!...



Don’t forget to sign up for this transformative challenge! Join me on a moon cycle journey to connect with our sacred womb center. 
Starting on July 23 I will post tips,exercises and meditations to aid you on your journey in connecting to your  womb, the temple of our divine feminine power.
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How to Be There for Others Without Taking on Their Pain

“Letting go helps us to live in a more peaceful state of mind and helps restore our balance. It allows others to be responsible for themselves and for us to take our hands off situations that do not belong to us. This frees us from unnecessary stress.” ~Melody Beattie

When our loved ones suffer, it’s hard not to get swept up in their pain. We want so desperately to fix them, to take away their hardship, and to see them flourishing.

As a control freak, I often find myself going into “fixer mode” when my partner is struggling with work stress, which only makes me more anxious when nothing I suggest works, and him more frustrated when I get so preoccupied with his issues.

Then, after all my frantic attempts at control, there’s a little voice inside that tells me to stop. To listen. To be there for him without trying to change anything. To witness his pain and sit next to him while he feels it.

In this way, it’s not my job to fix his problems. It’s my job to be there for him with love as he figures out how to handle his own suffering. I am freed from feeling the responsibility of taking on his pain.

Here are a few tips for how to not get overwhelmed when others are suffering.

Realize that being supportive doesn’t mean fixing their problems.

I often think back to when my mental health was at its worst. I dealt with debilitating panic disorder, agoraphobia, and depression, and I can’t imagine how difficult it must have been for my family to see me suffering so greatly.

But what I am most grateful for during that time is that my loved ones never tried to fix me. They didn’t become obsessed with finding a solution, and they didn’t rush me to get better. All of that would have increased my anxiety tenfold.

Instead, they simply supported me. They constantly let me know that they were there for me if I needed them. Just knowing that I had someone to count on if things got hard was incredibly helpful.

One way we can be supportive of others is to practice listening without the intent to respond with solutions. What would that be like if we simply held space for others without needing to respond?

I took a yoga workshop recently where we partnered up with a stranger and took turns sharing our struggles. The one not speaking had to simply listen, and was not allowed to respond.

So we practiced listening with our whole bodies, hearts, and minds, released from the need to think of something to say in return. Instead, we got to be a loving witness to this person’s experience.

Sometimes all that our loved ones need is to be seen, and to know that someone is there for them.

Allow them to find their own way.

This can be hard. It’s hard to let go of control so much that you allow other people to have their own journeys. If my family or partner would have stepped in during my rough patches with panic disorder, I wouldn’t have gone through the trenches of it myself.

I wouldn’t have learned my own strength. I wouldn’t have been so amazingly transformed- body, mind, and soul, as I am now.

At that time, I didn’t need someone to take away my pain; I needed someone to be there with love and patience as I experienced my own pain.

Can we offer loving suggestions? Sure. Can we help them in productive ways? Of course. But at the end of the day, it is their lesson to learn. And we have to practice letting go of the outcome.

When a relative passed from cancer a couple of years ago, it was horrifying to see her transform from a vibrant woman to a frail, bedridden one, writhing in pain. Those last few days, she lost her vision. She couldn’t eat or drink. All she wanted was for the suffering to end.

After witnessing this, I automatically wanted to take on that pain. I felt it as my own. I started to suffer the pain she was experiencing.

Eventually, I had to realize that this was her journey. This was her pain, not mine, and I didn’t have to take that on. It actually doesn’t help anyone or anything for us to carry around pain that isn’t even ours.

Realize that you’re only responsible for yourself.

You can’t control other people. You can’t control who suffers and who doesn’t. And what a burden that would be if we felt we needed to safeguard everyone in our lives from pain. That’s too overwhelming.

You are only responsible for yourself. So how can you take better care of yourself as you care for others?

If there’s someone in your life who is going through a rough time, you have to respect your own limits. You have to set boundaries in how much you can safely and lovingly give.

Giving to others when we are depleted ourselves doesn’t serve us, and it doesn’t serve them if they aren’t receiving your help out of love, but out of obligation or fear.

Instead, find ways you can care for and respect yourself, so that you can be available as a support if that feels appropriate and safe for you.

Practice grounding back into your own body and energy field often.

When we’re caring for others, we may have a tendency to take on their energy. It’s like when we’re around an angry person. Even if we’re not angry ourselves, we may feel our heart quicken, our breathing become shallow, and our temperature start to rise.

Practice grounding back into your own body so that you can recognize what’s yours and what is not.

One way to do this is to get physical, connecting back to your own body through yoga, exercise, and dance.

Immerse yourself in nature. I love to go hiking when I get overwhelmed with others’ energy, and allow the grounding energy of the earth to support me. Spend time alone.

Anything you can do to bring your attention back to your own body will serve you in grounding your energy.

It can be very difficult to separate ourselves from others and to let go of needing to take away our loved ones’ pain. It’s something I still struggle with, but I’m learning every day that I am not responsible for anyone else. I can be there with love and kindness, but beyond that is out of my control.

All I can control is how well I care for myself, so that this love can then ripple out in support of others.

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About Malia Bradshaw

Malia Bradshaw is a yoga teacher, writer, and mental health advocate. You can find more of her work, including her life-changing Meditation Program for Anxiety, blog, e-books, yoga videos, and more at maliayoga.com. To connect, follow her on Instagram @yogaforanxiety.

Get in the conversation! Click here to leave a comment on the site.

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Wednesday, 19 July 2017

Tinaksite Clears Mental Clutter and Negativity

Tinaksite

Tinaksite creates privacy by making you less visible. Brings inspiration and positive thinking. It has strong metaphysical properties that release bitterness and negativity. Can be used in rituals to remove dark negative energy.



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How a “Diagnosis” Can Alter Your Life

VIckieTappingIt was the first session of my three-day pain relief event, and Vickie’s back pain was raging.  She had volunteered to come up on stage and share the story of her diagnosis.

Tears streamed down her face as soon as she began to speak.  “The doctor barely spent a few minutes with me before blurting out, ‘you’ll end up in a wheelchair’,” she shared.  “It was just so brutal, so heartless…  He didn’t have to say it that way.”

Vickie had gone to that doctor appointment full of hope, but had left so devastated, she could barely even respond to the doctor’s words.

Just thinking about her diagnosis was enough to put Vickie into a state of panic – and her chronic back pain into high gear.

Millions of people receive diagnoses like Vickie’s every day, and the experience in itself can be traumatic.

Man Sits With Hands ClaspedThink about it.  There you are, already stressed out from having chronic pain, sitting in the doctor’s office, hoping for good news in spite of the unrelenting pain you experience most days.

Then the man or woman in the white coat walks in.

They’ve got the degree and the experience to prove how qualified they are.  Naturally, you assume they know best, that what they say is the ultimate truth.

So when you hear them say words like “you’ll end up in a wheelchair” or “your pain will never go away”, it’s already too late…

By then, your rational brain has lost the battle.

The second you hear those words, your amygdala, an almond-shaped part of the mid-brain, goes on high alert, sending out distress signals throughout your body.

Your body is immediately flooded with the “stress hormone” cortisol, which shuts down specific parts of your brain, your digestive system, and more.

As much as your rational brain tries to reassure you that everything is okay, that you can get a second opinion and find pain relief, by this point your body is in full-blown panic mode, making it very difficult for you to think logically or creatively.

Woman Receiving Bad News From Her DoctorAs the hours, days, and weeks pass, the words your doctor said to you continue to ring in your ears, putting your body and your brain into CHRONIC high-stress mode.

With so much of the “stress hormone” cortisol constantly flooding your system, you’re at even greater risk for pain.

So, while it IS critical that you go see a doctor and get a diagnosis, the experience of getting your diagnosis is now contributing to your pain, making it more intense and more frequent.

But wait, what’s really going on here?  How is this even possible?

There’s a growing body of research that’s transforming our understanding of chronic pain.

Researchers at Stanford University, UC Davis, and other medical research institutions are finding that our stress and emotions influence whether pain becomes chronic, or goes away once a physical injury or health condition has healed or been successfully treated.

As I’ve seen over and over again in clients with chronic pain, once the underlying stress and emotions are released, pain relief happens.

For Vickie, that process began with a “sliver of hope.”

After tapping with me on stage and releasing the emotions she felt around her diagnosis, Vickie shared that she went home with a “sliver of hope.”  Although her pain was still there, for the first time since her diagnosis, she believed that pain relief was possible.

Several weeks later, Vickie joined a group follow-up call to that pain relief event, and shared that she was still hopeful that her pain might go away.  I then led her through several rounds of tapping to address the stress and overwhelm she was feeling.

By the end of our tapping, Vickie’s pain had completely gone away!

Her brain had heard the message, and quieted the danger signals it had been sending to her body.  That’s when the chronic pain she’d had for so many years just disappeared.

“So this is what it feels like!” she exclaimed once her pain had vanished.

“It feels like a beautiful vacation…  I feel amazing!”

Thanks to the larger process we went through during that pain relief event, tapping through the underlying elements that contribute to chronic pain, Vickie was just one of many who experienced pain relief.

Unfortunately, we could only fit a certain number of people in the room, and in the months following that event, we heard from so many of you who had wanted to attend, but hadn’t been able to.

We want everyone to have that same opportunity to experience lasting pain relief, so we created a pain relief home study course for you called:

The Tapping Solution for Pain Relief.

The Tapping Solution for Pain Relief

In The Tapping Solution for Pain Relief, I lead you through that same pain relief process that allowed Vickie, and so many others, to feel what it’s like to be pain-free again.

With The Tapping Solution for Pain Relief, we even include the recordings for the FULL Pain Relief World Summit, an online event that was attended by over 100,000 people.

This is such a powerful process, and the results we’ve seen are amazing.  I still get so excited seeing people come out of it pain-free. 🙂

If you or someone you know is struggling with chronic pain, I hope you’ll join us (or forward this program!) for this opportunity to experience lasting pain relief.

You can get the details here: The Tapping Solution for Pain Relief

Until next time…

Keep Tapping!

Nick Ortner

P.S. With The Tapping Solution for Pain Relief, you’ll also be invited to join our secret Facebook pain relief community, where you can connect with like-minded people who understand you and your experience.  Having that kind of support is so important!

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Ed’s Body Said “No” (Tapping for Crohn’s Disease)

A few weeks back, I was being interviewed by Dr. Ed Osburn for his podcast, “The Chiropractic Philanthropist”. He had invited me on to talk about my new book, “The Tapping Solution for Pain Relief” and I figured it would be a standard interview, explaining how tapping works, why it works so well for pain relief and how his listeners, mostly chiropractors, could use it with their patients as an adjunct to their work.

What I didn’t expect was when Dr. Osburn mentioned to me before we started recording that he had been diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in 2009 and had been in pain ever since. He told me it was something that he talked about openly on his podcast so I suggested that we explore tapping live on the podcast to see what might happen.

Now, that in and of itself is slightly remarkable, that I have SO much confidence in this technique and how I’ve seen it work again and again, that I’m willing to test it live on an interview. One might think it’s risky, or might say, “What happens if it doesn’t work, won’t you look silly?”  but I’ve just seen it work so often that I don’t seem to blink an eye anymore when it comes to putting it to the test!

We started the interview, and after I had covered the basics with Dr. Osburn, we moved on to demonstrate the process. He told me that his pain, as we talked, was a four out of ten and that it was like that most morning, with it increasing throughout the day. So we started tapping, first focusing on the pain itself and then going deeper, asking questions like, “If there was an emotion in your gut, what would it be?” .  We talked about “when it started” – what was going on in his life in 2009, and found a lot of “gold” to work with there.

When did it start?

Dr. Osburn shared that in 2009, he was running an extremely busy practice, training for a 100 mile race and just going, going, going non-stop. We tapped on some of the feelings around that time and also worked on what his life would be like if his pain went away completely. We identified some fears about the pain going away because if the pain went away…then he’d have to go back to his life in 2009, and he didn’t want that…

All this emotional conflict around the pain, all this turmoil, all this stress and fear was keeping his body from healing, and we worked to explore that and let it go. Within the 40 minutes we spent together on the podcast, only about 15 of them spent tapping, his pain went from a 4 out of 10 to a .5!!! Almost gone, he could barely feel it. We wrapped up the podcast and I offered to work with him for a few minutes longer, to see if we could get the pain down further.

After another 15-20 minutes of tapping, his pain was completely GONE! I was astounded. I continue to be every time I see this happens, because it’s just simply amazing. I asked him more about the pain, confirming that it was completely gone and asked him, “When was the last time you were pain free?” He replied, “2009”.

“Wait,” I said, “Just to be clear, you’ve been in pain constantly since 2009? Not one break?”

“Yes,” he said, “Even when I was on painkillers, I still felt the pain. This is the first time since 2009 that I’ve been pain-free.”

We were conducting the interview and session on video Skype, so I could SEE not only the relief on Dr. Osburn’s face, but also some confusion! How could this be happening! We signed off and I asked him to keep me appraised of what was happening and to continue tapping and going deeper.

I received this email from him the next day:

Yesterday was a very good day…I felt so much better I almost did not feel myself.

My wife was amazed (and so was I of course) –I was in my office in the afternoon for a consult and often I feel really crappy–but my energy was great and in fact I did not think about the discomfort or difficulties with heading to the practice once. Most often I am anxious and distracted–very unusual experience for me.

This morning I am about a 2/10….but that doesn’t matter because I know there is a strategy or tool to help–where there really wasn’t before–I have restored hope.

This stuff runs deep for me and I’d be very surprised of my healing did not require some work–I ran out yesterday and picked up your book “The Tapping Solution” at our local bookstore and I am determined to make this a daily ritual –there’s many limiting beliefs to work on.

What’s most exciting to me about this email is that Dr. Osburn has found HOPE and is willing to continue to working. It’s a good sign that the pain was only at a 2, so it’s less than when we started, and with continued work I know he can help his body heal.

So if you’re dealing with a diagnosis that seems hopeless, if you’re in pain, or feeling fatigue or just not experiencing the health you most desire, then I urge you to pick up a copy of my new book, “The Tapping Solution for Pain Relief”: http://ift.tt/1NnuaD2

Comment below: What are you struggling with? What does this article bring up in you?

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Weight Loss with Tapping

Drill-sergeant-largerDecember is filled with celebratory foods and drinks that are good for our spirit but not so good for our waistline. Come January 1st the joy and carefree spirit of the holidays leave us and a drill sergeant moves into our head and tells us the fun is over and it’s time to diet.

This was the pattern I ran for years… and years. A new year equaled a new diet. Sure, the drill sergeant in my head made me feel awful but isn’t that what it takes to get results? It took me a long time to realize this approach doesn’t flatten my stomach but simply flattens my self-worth. You probably know that. How many times have you started a new year with a new diet only to find yourself in the last few weeks of January saying “I give up. This is too hard. Nothing works for me.” You then feel worse than when you started. The truth is, long-term weight loss is not possible or sustainable unless we make it pleasurable. We can’t make it pleasurable unless we tap away our self judgments and critical voice.

Here are a few tips to help you make this year your healthiest year yet.

At the end of this post you’ll find a tapping meditation that will help you incorporate all these tips.

1. Leave the pattern of panic behind

When we begin to panic about our weight the part of our brain called the amygdala begins to fire off the fight-or-flight response. This creates an overproduction of the hormone called cortisol. Studies have shown that an overproduction of cortisol increases appetite, sugar cravings and is directly linked to abdominal obesity. That drill sergeant isn’t helping you, it’s making you fat!

The best way to kick that drill sergeant out of your head is to give it a voice while you tap. It’s really that simple. When you are able to become aware of you self-criticism and tap while speaking it to yourself, you’ll find that you can hear those words without feeling the physical sensation of anxiety. From that place you can choose a more loving thought and action that supports you

2. Forgive yourself

So your biggest arm work out this holiday season was opening a bottle of wine? The past is in the past. Next year you can learn healthier recipes and strategies to help support your body during the holidays. Beating yourself up over your past actions doesn’t prevent them from happening again, it simply robs you of the power in the present moment to make a change. Be gentle with yourself. Forgive.

3. Fall in love with the journey

happy-with-the-processIf we focus on a strict goal with some made up deadline we then try to panic ourselves there by eating in a manner that’s restrictive and lacks joy. Un-pleasurable equals unsustainable. For real lasting weight loss we need to fall in love with the journey because health isn’t a destination but a decision we make every moment.

This isn’t really about a weight loss goal, this is about you showing up as your best self. It’s about eating foods that you love and help you thrive. It’s about moving your body because when there is movement in your body there is movement in your life. It’s about taking care of yourself because you have a deep appreciation for the amazing person you are. Once we fall in love with this process the results are better than we could have imagined.

Here is a tapping mediation to help you incorporate these three keys to create lasting weight loss with Tapping in the New Year:

Right click and save here to download this audio

From everyone here at the tapping solution, we wish you a happy and healthy new year.

With Love,

Jessica

P.S. –  Come this May I’m coming out with a new book, “The Tapping Solution for Weight Loss and Body Confidence.” Watch this space. A lot more tapping goodness is on it’s way from me. ☺

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ACE Study and Weight Loss

CaseStudy.V2I want to tell you about a fascinating research study that I came across recently…

Popular culture has long told us that weight is the result of choices we make. For decades we’ve been told that having difficulty with losing weight means we’re eating too much and exercising too little.

Problem is, that’s NOT what recent research is telling us.

Thanks to recent findings, we now know that physical health, including weight, is intricately connected with emotions. Sometimes those emotions can stem from past experiences.

In other words, it’s NEVER about what’s “wrong” with you, it’s about unresolved emotions and what your subconscious mind thinks is safe.

“Huh?”, you’re probably asking yourself right now. “What does that even mean?”

It means that if your subconscious mind wants you to hold onto the weight, that’s exactly what will happen.

Even if you eat less and exercise more, the weight either won’t come off, or won’t stay off.

Let me explain…

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The Ace Study…

Much of this knowledge began with a huge and very important study called ACE.

It all started in 1985 in a weight loss clinic in San Diego run by Dr. Vincent Felitti, who was mystified by the 50% dropout rate amongst patients who were having great success losing weight.

Hoping to understand why this was happening, he began reviewing his patients’ medical records in more detail, and discovered something that shocked him.

His patients hadn’t gained weight slowly over time, as he’d assumed. Instead, they’d gained weight quickly over a shorter period of time. Often, that weight gain had happened soon after painful experiences had occurred in their lives.

His findings later led to the ACE study, which was conducted by the CDC with over 17,000 participants. The findings highlighted the dramatic impact adverse childhood experiences have on health, including weight, in adulthood.

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What the Ace Study means for you and your health…

Understanding the dramatic impact of adverse childhood experiences is something that the over 10,000 women Jessica has worked with in her Weight Loss & Body Confidence 7-Week online course have also discovered in their own journeys.

While taking the course, Carol realized that it was her relationship with her mother, not her weight, that needed her attention.

For years, Carol’s job had required her to move to a different state in the U.S. every few years. Through the tapping she did during the course, Carol realized that she gained more weight every time she moved closer to her mother.

Since early childhood, her mother had been what Carol called an “energy vampire.” During some of the tapping exercises in the course, Carol realized that weight had been her “armor.” For decades, her brain and body had been using weight as a shield against her mother’s negative, controlling influence.

After tapping through her anger at her mother, Carol no longer needed weight to protect her. By creating healthier boundaries with her mother, she could protect herself.

Once Carol’s subconscious mind understood that it was safe to let go of the weight, she was able to create a new relationship with her body and with food.

Then, for the first time in her life, weight loss didn’t’ feel like a struggle. Instead, weight began coming off naturally.

The same thing happened for Bobbie, Lena, Tara, and many, many others.

Once they tapped through unresolved emotions, some of which originated in the past, weight loss felt easier than it ever had.

It’s an important reminder that weight is NEVER about what you are or aren’t doing “right.”

As Jessica wrote in her New York Times best-selling book, The Tapping Solution for Weight Loss & Body Confidence…

You are NOT a problem that needs to be solved.

And in Jessica’s course, you can use tapping and other exercises to release emotions that are keeping you stuck in a place where sustainable weight loss seems impossible.

If you’re interested in learning more about this course, which begins on Monday, you can go here:

http://ift.tt/2tfMoEh

So many of Jessica’s students have RAVED about the results they’ve gotten from this course.

Throughout the course (and beyond!), her students have also loved the opportunity to connect with a tribe of supportive, like-minded women.

As one student wrote,

“This group provides something I have been looking for for 54 years – acceptance. It is so powerful, and it helps me accept and love myself. It is safe to ask for help, and NO ONE has told me to try harder or suggested that what I bring to the table is not enough.”

(Please Note: This course is for WOMEN ONLY. Nothing personal, guys, but women’s experiences around weight is often very different from men’s.)

In addition to feeling more confident than ever before, as a result of this course, many of Jessica’s students have been able to make all kinds of positive changes in their lives, from deepening their relationships to starting new careers, and more.

As another woman expressed after completing the course,

“Thank you, Jessica, for tricking us with the title of this course. What I think you were really creating was a movement for empowering women to transform our lives, get our energies flowing, strut our stuff, make the world a better place, and fall in love with life… with the helpful side effects of losing weight and living longer, happier, healthier lives! Am I am so grateful!”

You can learn more here:

http://ift.tt/2tfMoEh

Until Next Time… keep tapping!

Nick Ortner

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Money and Spirituality – A Common Dilemma

All too often incredibility smart, caring people with amazing ideas and talents for transforming the planet hold themselves back from earning money because of a belief, conscious or unconscious, that it isn’t spiritual to earn money or that if they earned a lot of money that they somehow would be corrupted or bad in some way.

They often times also believe that you can’t be wealthy and be a good person, that you somehow have to do something bad to become wealthy.  And unfortunately in this day and age it’s all too easy to turn on the news and hear about corrupt businessmen and politicians who have done something unethical to earn money.  Sadly, there is not enough news on all of the amazing wealthy people that are changing the world in powerfully positive ways.

When I wrote in 2010 on this topic, I was speaking on the issue that so many Tapping practitioners were facing and still face around not feeling that they should be charging for what they do, even though they are helping so many. This limiting belief that earning money is not spiritual has not only held back healers like Tapping practitioners and coaches but so many others in a wide range of industries.

Let me start off with a simple statement of fact that is important to note…

There are examples of both people doing unethical things to earn money in the world as well as people doing amazing, completely ethical things that are serving the world to earn money.  Money itself is not the determining factor in whether a person is good or bad.

If you disagree with that statement in any way, I think it’s worth taking a look at where your beliefs on money have come from and how they’re effecting you.

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Take a moment to think about your beliefs around money and spirituality.

MoneyDo you think you’d still be a good person if you had a lot of money?

Do you worry that you would somehow be corrupted?

What do you think others would think of you if you had a lot of money?

Do you think it’s right or fair to earn a lot of money for helping people?

Or should you not be paid if you’re working on helping people or other spiritual endeavors?

These are all important questions.

Let’s look at two scenarios that address this issue.  These are the two examples I used when I originally wrote on this topic:

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Case Study #1: Excited Potential Tapping Practitioner

Mary works for a financial services company, as an administrative assistant. She makes $45,000 per year, has good health benefits, and feels generally secure in her job. She doesn’t enjoy it one bit, but every other Friday she has her paycheck direct deposited into her bank account, and along with her husband’s salary, it makes ends meet.

She never has to ask for this money, every year or two she gets a small raise and she continues onwards. The subject of “money”, rarely comes up for her with regards to receiving it from her employer. She doesn’t question the work they do, the profits they are earning but is content to get her paycheck.

Mary discovers Meridian Tapping, and is thrilled with the results she gets for herself and her family members. She does more training, gets her hands on all the free resources she can, and begins to become quite proficient at tapping. She dreams of helping other people, but she just keeps doing “free” sessions.

People offer to pay her, they are delighted with the results, but she just “doesn’t feel right taking the money”. She believes the work was so much fun, so rewarding, that money shouldn’t be involved. More and more people start coming to her, and she says quietly to herself, “How I would love to do this full time!”

But when she sits down with her husband to discuss the subject of her leaving her job, the math just doesn’t add up. Her husband says, “If you charged $75 per hour and had three clients per day, for 50 weeks out of the year, we would be around your current salary, including benefits, and other perks”

“$75 per hour???” Mary says, “There is no way I could charge that, that’s not right at all. I would feel completely uncomfortable”

Her husband replies, “Do you think what you’re providing is worth $75 per hour?”

Mary, “Well, people do get amazing results faster than anything else they do. I worked with someone the other day who had spent 5 years in therapy, and over $10,000, and we collapsed her issue in one session! But…. It still wouldn’t “feel” right, I just can’t charge for this…”

So there, sadly, the story ends. Mary’s limiting belief about receiving, about charging money for her healing work leaves her at her unfulfilling job.

The consequences of this belief are profound.

And not just for Mary, but for the hundreds of people she could have helped… If only she had been able to accept the fact that money, that the energy of money, is a reality of this earthly experience, and that learning to ask for it and accept it when providing healing services can change the world.

Are you a “Mary”? How many “Marys” could be out in the world right now, changing lives on a daily basis?

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Case Study #2: A dream, a vision, and “money”….

The first case study was hypothetical, though I’ve seen real life examples over and over again. This story is as real as it gets, because it’s my story! Just over four years ago now, I had the dream, the inspiration, to make a documentary film about Tapping. I had seen the results in my life and the lives of my friends and family over and over again, and felt that the world needed to know more about this!

Mind you, I had NO experience in film-making, NO equipment, NO staff, just the dream… But I set off to make the film anyway. I was committed to the vision and the dream but I was ALSO practical about the financial side of it. You see, to make the movie, I had to invest $150,000 of money I didn’t have! I put it all on credit cards and credit lines, maxed to the hilt. I went to friends and family to borrow money. I recruited friends and family to work on the film. Jessica Ortner, my sister and one of the producers, and Nick Polizzi, my close friend, director and editor worked for nothing for over two years.

They too were committed to the vision, the dream, the experience, but they also knew at some point that the film would have to be financially feasible, that they would be rewarded for their efforts, so they could pay back the credit card debt they had accrued and be able to continue in this work.

I WISH that when I came up with this idea, I could have called the mortgage company, the credit card companies, the local grocery store, the insurance company, the car company, the phone company, the electric company, the heating company…

And said to them, nicely, “Dear Sirs, I’ve just come up with a fantastic idea that I truly believe is going to change the lives of millions of people around the world. I want to share the knowledge about an incredible technique and do it in a documentary format, so people could see real results that they could use to change their lives. It will truly be for the betterment of humanity and I’ll even give you copies of the film when it’s done!”

Then they could have said to me, “Great idea Nick! We’ll stop charging you for everything you need to live, so you can put this plan into action!”

Unfortunately….

The game doesn’t really work that way!

So if I was to make it work, to pay back the $150,000+ (the final budget of the film), to be able to sustain myself and my family, I simply had to make it financially feasible. Which meant I had to do everything I could to not only create a superior product (and fortunately the reviews on our website and Amazon.com show that the end product is powerful and changing lives), but I also had to do everything I could to SELL it.

Oh! Another dirty word! SELL!

Ugh… Icky…..Dangerous….

No, it’s not. It’s reality.

If I wanted to make this whole dream work, I simply had to be able to sell the film, and sell other things. Otherwise, I’d have to be like Mary, and go back to a “job”.

Because of all of the work I’ve done helping others I’ve been able to donate hundreds of thousands of dollars to organizations I really believe in, like Project Light which is using EFT with genocide survivors in Rwanda, the Veterans Stress Project using EFT with war veterans, the Unstoppable Foundation, building schools in Africa and the You Can Thrive Foundation helping women in NYC who are dealing with cancer.

I wouldn’t have been able to do any of these things if I had thought that it wasn’t right for me to make money or that it wasn’t spiritual.  The truth is that I think I’m a more spiritually ground and honest person now then I’ve ever been.  And I think that I’ve done more to help people around the world in the last couple years then I did in the 10 years before that and all while making more money then I’ve ever made before.

Whether you have a business or a job, every day you have little decisions where you can choose to do the right thing to earn money, or you can choose to do the wrong thing.  For example in my business, in a mostly “online” world, I have the choice to sell products and courses in a way where I’m educating people on what I’m offering and then giving them the choice as to whether it’s right for them or not, or I can choose to use techniques that are manipulating to convince them to buy.

I’m literally faced with that choice every day.  And if you’re in business or within your job, you have similar choices every day.  You can choose to do things in a way where your goal is to help people and serve them while making money, or you can do things in a way where you’re focus is on making money first.

But ultimately, how much money you charge or earn is not the issue.  If you’re doing things in a way that is serving the world and helping others then you deserve to have as much money as you want!

So you see, it all “works” when everyone gets in alignment with the energy of money. When we stop bickering about someone “selling” healing, or how it should all be free. 🙂

I’ve been saying recently that the BEST thing that can happen in any industry is for people to figure out how to make BILLIONS of dollars doing things that serve humanity.

If you have ideas and a passion for something that helps others and helps yourself, then don’t let anything stop you.  Don’t hold back your unique gifts from the world.  You deserve to have everything you’ve ever wanted.  🙂

So, your blog question for today is…

What limiting beliefs might you have about money or selling?

Are you ready to tap those away?

Is it OK for people to make a lot of money?

Are you finally ready to unplug from what the rest of society tells you and blaze your own trail?

Comment below!

Until next time…

Keep tapping!

Much love,

Nick

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Shhhh… Don’t Tell Anyone… (How to nurture an idea)

if-you-can-dream-itPerhaps it’s just because of my “story”…

About how I had this crazy idea to make a documentary film about EFT Tapping, with no filmmaking experience, limited funds (my personal credit cards!) and no initial team…

And yet somehow managed to get the film out into the world, create the Tapping World Summits, and write a NY Times best-selling book… people ask… “HOW???”

“How did you do it?”

Obviously, there were a lot of elements to this journey that just can’t be covered in one blog post (though I do share more of that journey in my book, but here I’d like to share one that I found and continue to find VITALLY important.

It’s a place where a lot of people struggle, and where, frankly, some amazing ideas find their way into the idea graveyard or garbage can, never seeing the light of day.

It’s a crucial point in time, in the process of creating a grand vision…

It’s… right… in… the… beginning….

The… birth… of… this… fresh… young… tender… idea…

The Birth of an Idea…

You know the feeling: Ahh… inspiration!  You’re relaxed, you’re taking a bath or a shower, you’re walking in the woods… and it hits you!  What if I create this?  What if I start this?  What if I change this?  What if I do this?

And it’s an exciting time!  Yes!  This is it!  This is going to be great… this is going to change the world… this is going to change my life…. I’m going to do it!

Now… hit “Pause” on that scene, because this is a crucial time in the life of an idea.

You have two choices here:

A. Tell others about it, tell the world about it, and take action

B. Stay silent and take action

What choice would you make here?  What choice have you made in the past?

What do you think I’m going to recommend?  Well, the title of this blog post might have given that answer away, “Shhh…don’t tell anyone…” 🙂

How to Nurture an Idea…

How to nurture an ideaAt this point in the lifecycle of an idea, I highly recommend you stay silent OR at the very most share it with one or two people who you REALLY, REALLY trust to give you positive feedback (though that can be really hard to find, so the preference is to stay silent!)

Why?  Because this little (eventually big!) idea is just a little seedling.  Like the young tender plants that my wife Brenna and I (mostly her!) plant and nurture inside for spring planting, we must get them strong and ready to be in the ground.

They need just the right amount of water, just the right amount of light, just the right amount of air…

So does your IDEA.

Let’s play out the opposite scenario, where you share your idea with someone, especially when it’s young, not fully formed, tender…

You say, “Hey John! I just had this great idea to do X…” and John says, “Really?  Wow, I don’t know about that, sounds like it would be really hard…”

Or even something a little bit more positive like… “That’s a really cool idea, but you have to be aware of this…”

Or whatever John says that isn’t 100% positive, nurturing and uplifting.  THIS is the place where ideas die.  THIS is the place where that initial enthusiasm gets squashed and you start questioning yourself, “Maybe John is right…”

(Important Note: Fortunately, with the power of Tapping, if you are in this place you can actually bring the idea back to life, by letting go of the limiting beliefs, the fears, what you heard, etc.  If you’re not familiar with Tapping, you can learn about it here.

What’s crazy about this moment in the life cycle of the idea is that someone could be positive, but even give you a “look” that deflates your enthusiasm… and… the idea withers.

We are, for better or worse, really influenced by our peers, our parents, our society (and again, you can tap on working to clear that influence!)

When to share your idea…

Now, let’s be honest here, the strength of your idea WILL be tested at some point.  It’s a given.  I’m not saying, “Never tell anyone about it!” because that’s obviously impossible.  When I had the idea to make the film, I had to get buy-in from other people to support the vision.  I had to share the idea.

The key is to either:

A. Wait until you’ve thought about it more, started on the project (it’s harder for people to squash something you’ve already started!), and moved further down the line.

B. When the idea does get tested, wherever it is in its life cycle, TAP to clear out any fear, limiting beliefs, etc, as per above.

When young plantlings are ready for the garden, they will thrive and grow because of the care we’ve taken with them in the beginning.

Treat your ideas with that same tender care, and they will flourish, come to life, and manifest in this world!

“It is not once nor twice but times without number that the same ideas make their appearance in the world.” – Aristotle

(my addition to the quote: “So it’s not about having the idea, it’s about nurturing it to grow and spread in the world!)

Make sure to leave your comments, what direction you think you’ve taken in the past, and what direction you think you’ll take going forward.

Have you had a great idea that perhaps you shared a little too soon, and weren’t happy with the reaction of others? How did that make you feel? Did you tap on it?  What do you think about keeping the idea to yourself until it grows and strengthens?  Comment below!

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